“I’m not a victim, I’m a survivor.” Victim means a casualty, a sufferer, an injured party, or being wounded. The word victim is all about ongoing suffering, pain, or injury. Survivor has to do with staying, sticking, fighting, and being tough. The word survivor indicates an injury has occurred but there has been no defeat. There could be lingering, unrepairable issues, but nothing able to take you down. To be a survivor doesn’t necessarily mean the pain has ended, it means the pain no longer matters. A victim can only be pitied for their suffering, while a survivor, admired, for putting suffering behind them. Even though I didn’t choose to be a victim of my husband’s death, I do have a choice to either remain a victim or become a survivor. I can keep bumping into the huge ball of crap placed in my way and become comfortable with pity, self or otherwise, or I can figure out how to deflate it down to pocket size, where possibilities exist to either carry it with ease, pull it out when it needs a good stomping, or toss it into the trash for good. I’m going to find a nice big pin!