Thrown Away

There are people in this world that are born socializers.  People who want to, like to, need to, socialize with others and develop lots of relationships.  I am not one of those people, but my husband was.  I’ve found some relationships, and some have ended, as relationships sometimes do, usually because it’s one sided and I need that verification that I’m wanted in return, that I’m needed.  I can’t think of any relationships, my husband ever had, that ended, no matter what.  He not only wanted every relationship he found, he needed them.  Without them he wasn’t quite a whole person.  Some of his relationships were one sided, and I know that hurt him because he would bring it up sometimes, but each relationship was more important than being wanted in return.  He was the one to call, the one to visit, no matter the response or lack thereof.  I guess I could say he simply loved people much better than me, because he loved unconditionally in conditions that made me stop trying.  He was a much better person than me because he didn’t throw people away for not wanting or needing him.  How can I make that me?


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