Here I Am

Here I am, going about my day, and where are you?  Do you have some kind of body or are you just a spirit?  Are you aware of who or what you are?  Are you looking at me from heaven like I’ve heard people say?  I sometimes wonder what you think of my sadness, my joy, and the decisions I’ve made, but then remember it doesn’t matter because you’re not here.  Do you feel sad or know nothing but joy and freedom; freedom from this earthly body and the crap life throws at you.  Are you proud of me or jealous because of what you’re missing?  I have a body and a spirit, and acutely aware of who I am.  Maybe you see me, maybe not.  I hate sadness, love joy, and believe I’ve made the best possible decisions.  I feel lots of things, some good, some bad, and sometimes nothing at all.  I live in this earthly body every day and deal with the crap life throws at me, but get to experience new wonders too.  I’m proud of the progress I’ve made towards re-inventing me.  I didn’t choose life without you, but it’s here and so am I.

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