Choose

Unlike pine cones that must live where they land, I have a choice to stay or leave.  When I became aware, months after my husband’s death, of where I landed physically and mentally, I knew I had to leave.  I stayed in our home for as long as I could and then with family and friends because I realized that just me and my thoughts made an unhealthy partnership.  My thoughts and actions take me different places, sometimes beneficial, sometimes not, so I always need to be aware of where I’ve landed and choose to stay or leave.

  • Lone Tree / Choose
  • Cones fall and land along the highway
  • An excellent place to take root; no competition for sun and rain
  • The mowers cut down those that tried; except one
  • It landed on the edge of a low flat rock, its protector; its partner.
  • Someone will cut it down someday; can’t let trees grown just anywhere.
  • A life falls where it may, another where it chooses
  • There will always be easy places among the hard
  • For how long, who knows?
  • A life will make the most or the least of where it lands for as long as it can.
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2 thoughts on “Choose

  1. You are doing good stuff with this blog, Susan. “A life will make the most or the least of where it lands for as long as it can.” Jeez.

    Jeff and I talked about that when I visited him in Ti. He Looked me in the eye and said “what happened to us?” The two of us (and lots of our old friends) landed over and over in places we didn’t choose. We still grabbed life by the legs, flipped it upside down and shook it until all its pockets were empty. But I knew exactly what he meant. We had so much in our lives, and lots of love. But we never seemed to get past the trying, hoping one “big thing” that was born in us would change the world – or at least our world.

    What happened to us?

    For all the trying, a lot of the guys from Schenectady never figured out that being true to what we were built to be was our big thing. I wish Jeff had known deep in his gut that he was the best Jeff ever. He didn’t have to try hard for that, and being authentic came so easily to him maybe it didn’t seem like such a big deal. But it was.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you for these perfect words. Your description of grabbing life and being true and authentic are amazingly true. You described the “what happened” so wonderfully. Thank you for being in Jeff’s life and still in mine.

    Like

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