I rarely ask for help.  Instead I expect others to notice I need help and give it, therefore, I try to notice and offer help.  It’s not that I don’t need or want help because I think I’m so self-sufficient I can do it all.  I just can’t seem to make myself say, I need help.  It’s no wonder I’m often angry and resentful toward the people I think should be offering without being asked.  I realized recently that just as there are people like me who don’t ask, but rather expect, there are people who ask and don’t expect, so they don’t notice and offer help. Put these two people together and it’s a disaster; no one is asking, no one is offering, and the only person frustrated is the one not asking. Expecting anything of another person is futile because this is basically requiring a certain behavior without communicating what behavior is desired. Since not asking and not offering are two different paths that will never meet, I’m working on how to ask.  In the meantime I’ve determined not to be resentful towards those who don’t help me without being asked, because I can only change me.


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