Some of my close friends are also members of my family. I consider them friends first, family second. It’s amazing when family members make the transition to friends; no longer just a child, a sister, or a parent under obligation to spend time with me, to call me, to be there for me. It was my experience that my close friends became even closer after. I thought that the members of my family I wasn’t close to would now want to be my friends, but that didn’t happen and it hurt. It seemed logical that a death in our family that left me alone and needing help would make a difference in these relationships, but it didn’t. Now I see that I had unrealistic expectations of what I thought others should do and those expectations were what hurt me, not the rejection of friendship that happened many years ago. I can’t make someone want to be my friend, or love me, or care about me, no matter what the circumstances. The only expectations I should have are those I make of myself and those given to others, otherwise I will find myself often disappointed or just maybe unexpectedly surprised.